{{Short description|Expression of sympathy}} {{quote box | title = Letter of condolence | quote = {{font |font=Times New Roman |size=12pt | {{nbsp|5}} Sorrow comes to all; and, to the young, it comes with bitterest agony, because it takes them unawares. The older have learned to ever expect it. I am anxious to afford some alleviation of your present distress. Perfect relief is not possible, except with time. You can not now realize that you will ever feel better. Is not this so? And yet it is a mistake. You are sure to be happy again. To know this, which is certainly true, will make you some less miserable now. I have had experience enough to know what I say; and you need only to believe it, to feel better at once. The memory of your dear Father, instead of an agony, will yet be a sad sweet feeling in your heart, of a purer and holier sort than you have known before.}} | source = — U.S. President Abraham Lincoln<br>December 23, 1862<ref name="LincolnCondolence_18621223">{{cite web |last1=Lincoln |first1=Abraham |title=Abraham Lincoln on Living with Loss: His Magnificent Letter of Consolation to a Grief-stricken Young Woman |url=https://www.themarginalian.org/2016/10/24/abraham-lincoln-fanny-mccullough-consolation-letter |website=The Marginalian |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20220718023452/https://www.themarginalian.org/2016/10/24/abraham-lincoln-fanny-mccullough-consolation-letter/ |archive-date=July 18, 2022 |date=December 23, 1862 |url-status=live }}</ref> | align = right| width = 35%| border = 1px| fontsize = 100%| bgcolor = #fafafa| title_bg = #fafafa | title_fnt = #202060| qalign = left| salign = right }} '''Condolences''' (from Latin ''con'' (with) + ''dolore'' (sorrow)) are an expression of sympathy to someone who is experiencing pain arising from death, deep mental anguish, or misfortune.<ref>{{cite web | url=http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/condolence | title=condolence | publisher=Merriam-Webster | access-date= July 30, 2014}}</ref>

When individuals condole, or offer their condolences to a particular situation or person, they are offering active conscious support of that person or activity. This is often expressed by saying, "Sorry". Often, the English language expression "My condolences" will be in a context, such as of a friend's loved one, in which the one offering of condolences is communicating feelings of sympathy or empathy to that friend.

Condolence is not always expressed in sorrow or grievance, as it can also be used to acknowledge a fellow feeling or even a common opinion. There are various ways of expressing condolences to the victims. Examples include donating money to the charity nominated by the person who has just died, writing in a condolences book or supporting the friends and family of the loved one by making meals and looking after them in various ways in times of need.<ref>{{cite web |title=25 Professionals Share the Best Ways to Support Someone Who is Grieving | url=https://www.sympathymessageideas.com/expert-grief-support/ | date= March 17, 2023}}</ref>

A study from 2020 found that the specific words of condolence offered by doctors to grieving survivors can play a role in how those survivors fare in terms of subsequent mental health outcomes.<ref>{{Cite web|date=March 15, 2021|title=Bereavement Care in the Wake of COVID-19: Offering Condolences and Referrals|url=https://www.acpjournals.org/doi/10.7326/M20-2526}}</ref>

Messages of condolence are sometimes sent via telegram. In some European countries, that is considered a standard or a common way to offer condolences.<ref>{{Cite news|last=D’Amico|first=Paola|date=28 July 2010|title=Il postino non suona più il sabato|url=http://www.corriere.it/cronache/10_luglio_28/postino_5680c73a-9a06-11df-8339-00144f02aabe.shtml?refresh_ce-cp|newspaper=Corriere della Sera|language=it}}</ref><ref>{{cite news | url = https://www.rts.rs/lat/magazin/Zanimljivosti/5379117/telegrami-ptt-posta.html | language = sr | website = Radio Television of Serbia | title = Slanje telegrama i pored mobilnih telefona nije postalo istorija | date = 1 March 2024 | first = Milja | last = Gogić | quote = Najčešći povodi su i radosne i lepe vesti, kao i neke tužne, kao izjave saučešća.}}</ref><ref>{{cite journal | url = https://hrcak.srce.hr/en/14007 | language = hr | title = Lingvistika tekstnih vrsta, Nada Ivanetić, Uporabni tekstovi (Zavod za lingvistiku Filozofskog fakulteta Sveučilišta u Zagrebu, Zagreb 2003.) | first = Diana | last = Stolac | journal = Fluminensia : Journal for philological research | volume = 17 | number = 1 | year = 2005 | page = 104 | quote = Sućut je kratko pisamce ili u posljednje vrijeme sve češće telegram s emocionalnim, ali stereotipiziranim tekstom upućen osobi ili porodici koja je ostala bez bliske osobe. | publisher = University of Rijeka, Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences | issn = 0353-4642 }}</ref> It is similar in Japan.<ref>{{cite news | url = https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA717110334&sid=sitemap&v=2.1&it=r&p=AONE&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7Ecf655503&aty=open-web-entry | title = How Do Japanese Show They Care? By Sending a Telegram. | first1 = Ben | last1 = Dooley | first2 = Hikari | last2 = Hida | date = 13 September 2022 | newspaper = International New York Times | publisher = International Herald Tribune | via = Gale Academic OneFile | quote = "When it comes to things like condolences, telegrams are it." }}</ref>

== See also == *Consolation *Mourning *Thoughts and prayers

== References == <references/>

== External links == {{Wiktionary}} {{commonscat}} * [http://www.obituarieshelp.org/words_of_condolences_hub.html Condolence Message Examples] Examples of condolence messages to say and write for every situation.

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Category:Counseling Category:Grief